I have found that in relationships, every three months or so a crises erupts that spins the relationship significantly forward or backward. Because of this the first year of every relationship has four distinct phases, almost like the changes in seasons.
l. The Perfect Phase is the first three months
If this phase were a season, it would be summer, when you feel warm and malleable toward each other. The chemical attraction is strong between the two of you. You both look right to one another, dress right, talk right and your manners are correct. Everything is perfect. You have met your ideal mate.
2. The Imperfect Phase occurs during the second three months
This is the period when things start to cool down. People who have a fear of intimacy, usually like to abort the relationship between the third and sixth month. As soon as the Perfect Period is over, they run off to again seek the perfect person.
3. The third three months make up the Negotiable Phase,
when you and your prince face the cold, hard facts about each other and decide whether or not you can accept the other’s faults and adjust to the problems within the relationship. If you find you are more compatible than incompatible, that you like each other more than not, you will begin to negotiate a commitment.
4. The Commitment Phase is the last three-month phase
Like a new spring, this period provides new life to the relationship and is a foundation for permanence. It is at this time that you negotiate a long term commitment, usually involving marriage.
